I wrote an entry over on my Livejournal and when I saw the date marked 2010, the reality of the new year set in. Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday but I really think that New Year’s Day is a very close second. The idea of starting anew and celebrating this rebirth with your family and friends is attractive. God knows I could start over on myself a time or two (or three).

And yet, it’s all of the imperfections of life that we reflect on and remember at the end of each year and it’s these imperfections that determine “this year was a good year” or “this year just plain sucked” because it’s what makes each year different. I recently re-read The Giver by Joan Lowry Nixon and I noted that as a kid, I missed the concept of no holidays whatsoever. Nothing to mark the end of each year to the next except the changing of age from birth to age 12. After age 12, life is one long, boring existence without adventure or uniqueness to make it worth living.

I realize that I’m not saying anything new and I’m not saying it well but I guess my point is, in the end, that I’m learning to accept these imperfections as not necessarily bad parts of my life but instead, an adventure I survived. I can start over on myself every year because society accepts that. I can make resolutions and see if I meet my goals and if I do, I even have the right to kind of feel good about them. But, if I don’t, I’m not a failure. It’s just something that made that particular year a little more interesting…a little more worth living.

I think I’m done talking to myself now. Goodnight, self.