Now, I have so much to say that I don’t know where to start! I’m also terrible at writing anecdotes and remembering things that aren’t written as “and then, and then, and then” statements.

But, I’m going to attempt, since if I don’t I’ll beat myself up for it later. Here goes:

We are moving in less than two weeks. It’s here: Crunch Time. We’re frantically packing, even though we *tried* to be prepared and pack ahead of time and get whatever we could done. We’re cramming visits – tomorrow some friends from Atlanta are coming down and then we’re having dinner with Joshua’s mom and siblings (Sarah and Scot are coming up from Florida), then we need to make another visit out to Joshua’s Grandmommy. Not to mention we need to pack the rest of our apartment and clean so we can cheerfully hand over the keys next Thursday. (Oh. my. God. Next Thursday. Holy cow.)

Thankfully, we’ve spent a lot of time with Joshua’s parents this past week. The yard sale was Friday and Saturday so we went over Wednesday to help set up and pick Noah up after a Nana Playdate, and then went back Thursday to finish setting up and spend the night. We didn’t get home until Sunday morning. Noah had a blast the entire time as he played outside on the plasma cars and rough-housed with his uncles. The poor boy has two skinned knees, two skinned elbows and bug bites. He was so covered in dirt Friday that I had to hop in the tub with him to get him clean enough.

Oh, yes, for some reason Noah stopped taking baths alone. He promptly freaks out and tries to climb out of the tub. It does seem to be getting better, thankfully, as the last time I gave him a bath (yesterday), he continued to play even after I got out. Phew!

He’s such a character though, seriously. Last Thursday, we were outside and he was calling for “Daddy” and I said “Josh!” to get Joshua’s attention. Noah grins and starts saying “Josh! Josh! Jooosh!” over and over. We figured it was just a one-time thing, or maybe he thought it meant “come here!” but Joshua did something later – I can’t remember what – and Noah goes “Jooosh…” like he’s scolding him. Goofball.

He’s also saying two word sentences which is just awesome. He looooves avocado which is great for his anemia and he’s been doing better about getting food and drinking juice.

I really do get this stuff written down, I swear, but Twitter and Livejournal are so easy because I don’t feel like I have to be coherent or put effort into writing a full entry. That, and LJ is for certain eyes only. ;-)

Well, I think I’ve successfully written an entry. It may be all over the place and badly written but I’m calling it good, for now.

Some people tell me just to let it go. Not brush his teeth until he’s old enough to be reasoned with and I wish I could do this. If he wasn’t predisposed to cavities and if he was nightweaned, I might let it go if he’s having a particularly rough night, like tonight. Unfortunately, he IS prediposed to cavities and he ISN’T nightweaned. He’s already had two difficult procedures done and I will do whatever I can to prevent another.

I just can’t help the thoughts that come to my mind when I’m brushing his teeth. Is he traumatized from his experiences with the dentist? Does he think I’m betraying him? Can he possibly understand that this is for his own good and that I don’t get any pleasure from forcing this on him?

Right now, I feel like both the best mother in the world and the worst. I reassure myself that I’m doing the right thing but it is so difficult. *sigh* I did let him “brush” my teeth earlier and it was so hilarious to him that I might be able to work something out where he brushes mine as I brush his. If that doesn’t work, I’m liable to break down in tears tomorrow morning.

Oh, and as an aside, we bought Sensodyne toothpaste today. I’m already noticing a difference so I hope it will help my teeth as far as brushing goes.

Today, however, I went to the dentist (I’m starting to feel like I’m always in that chair one way or another) and had my tooth filled. I was a nervous wreck last night and this morning and I felt like I was going to pass out or throw up or both while waiting in the office for my name to be called. The dentist did an excellent job on my tooth though, as far as I can tell. You can’t even really tell there was ever an issue with that tooth, much less one that almost made me lose a prominent front tooth. I do have to admit that I love Hoobastank for the assistance though. The drilling really gets to me so I turned the music up as loudly as I could stand it and thought about everything but the work the dentist was doing. Unfortunately, there is still so much more than needs to be done and as soon as we have the money or insurance (or both), I will be. Yuck. I think there’s two extractions and two root canals with crowns in there somewhere…not to mention a dozen or so fillings. *sigh* And Dr. P’s office tried to say it wasn’t genetic!

Whatever. Afterwards, we went over to Shannon’s house and I looked through a ton of clothes she had set aside out of Joe’s closet. We have clothes for Noah from 3T through size 6; mostly play and house stuff but it’s all nice and I’m relieved to have them. It’s one thing to buy a few quality pieces for nicer events but it’s quite another to try to outfit an entire wardrobe for a boy that grows in feet, not inches (I’m not sure I’m exaggerating). There was quite a lot to go through, have I said that before?

I also went through all of the boxes in their storage closet. I wiped out our wedding box – stuff either went into the yard sale pile or the trash bin and I saved a whole ziploc baggy worth of items (Dad’s candle, a couple of bells, a picture, a piece of my dress and two small flowers). Joshua and I kept our Bride/Groom champagne flutes and my wedding bouquet (that I made) but those are always on display. I felt really good about paring down because I know three years ago I couldn’t have done it. Now, I just want what we do keep to matter to me, not to the story they might hold some day.

There were quite a few boxes that needed to be consolidated or weeded through and we did that. We have a decently sized stack of boxes in there still, along with our coats and luggage, but they are all packed and ready to be loaded into the moving van. I’m grateful that my in-laws are so generous with their storage space. I wish I had decluttered a lot sooner but I don’t think I was really ready until more recently. This move certainly kicked my butt into gear as far as keeping stuff on hand goes.

So that’s our day. Joshua, Noah and I got home, ate chili (using our pantry stores) and watched Bewitched. Noah took a two hour nap, played in his playroom and finally crashed around 1 AM (mostly because he had such a late nap today since he refuses to sleep at Shannon’s house).

I’m happy. I feel like this move is sanctioned by God for multiple reasons. I’m excited to see my family, to get back on our feet and to get into a new place. One more month!

Yep, you heard me. A second one.

See, about a week after his first surgery, I noticed the tiniest of grooves on the other side of his mouth in relatively the same spot as the last one. I kept an eye on it and it seemed to be getting bigger so I brought him to the local dentist. Unfortunately, we didn’t get to see Dr. W and ended up seeing a different dentist who didn’t have the best bed side manner but did know her stuff. She immediately referred us to Dr. P (formerly known as Dr. P², since the original Dr. P is out of the picture).

So Tuesday, we trekked up to Newnan and stayed in a hotel (graciously provided by my in-laws) where we watched Hell’s Kitchen, The Nanny and otherwise enjoyed a short break from home. Since Noah couldn’t have anything to eat or drink after midnight for the procedure the next morning, we were trying to avoid having to drive him up to Newnan while hungry AND tired AND fussy. Noah did relatively well that night, sleeping a solid six hours without wanting to nurse, which is pretty unusual for him. I did pump him full of squash and applesauce before I brushed his teeth and gave him a good nursing and I hope it helped. Whatever did it, he slept through and we got him to the clinic.

When we got there, we waited a good thirty minutes before they got us to the back where one of the dental assistants tried to tell me that a predisposition to cavities just couldn’t be genetic and that it HAD to be the breastmilk that was causing Noah’s teeth to get cavities. While I can say that he doesn’t need to nurse all night or all day long without having his teeth brushed, I can’t say I agree that I should suddenly switch to cow’s milk because someone without a dental degree says so. She also couldn’t get through to her head which tooth had the issue and kept asking if the “filling” (his crown) came out, so I’m sure you can imagine why I am skeptical of anything she had to say to me.

Anyway, when Dr. P saw his teeth, she confirmed that he had two brand new cavities. Thankfully they were pretty small since we had caught them so early (score one for vigilant mommy, finally!) and said he didn’t need the Versed to be sedated for the procedure (so we starved our kid for 8 1/2 hours because…?). Not that I want to put anything into Noah’s body that is unnecessary so we were thankful – at first.

She swore that the papoose board would be the best choice, as it would take longer with Joshua holding him (squirmy) so I went against all of my natural gut instincts, personal fears and intelligent thought and agreed to try it that way. What I didn’t know, until they had already started, was that they weren’t going to give my little baby boy ANY numbing medicine whatsoever! Both fillings were done within five minutes or I would have raised far more hell but I will tell you, I will never. ever. ever subject my son to that again. Parents that are reading this and are debating on using the papoose board on a toddler without sedatives or pain medicine – DON’T! It’s traumatic for the parents and it isn’t easy even for our resilient toddlers who scream for five minutes while a stranger puts them through pain (necessary procedure or not). Since Noah is so young, I don’t expect him to remember any of it and after a nap he was back to his normal, sunny self but I can’t forget the way he was sobbing in my arms after I yanked him out of that stupid papoose board. And I mean yanked – as soon as they scooted back and said they were done, I was ripping the velcro apart and scooping him into my arms.

I trust Dr. P as far as knowing her stuff. I know she did a good job and this visit was a huge contrast with the other one, where he needed a tooth extraction and a crown. With that one (I’ve already written this much so I may as well keep going), we went to Newnan the night before, where Noah woke up every two hours wanting to nurse. I think he fell asleep on the hotel floor three times and I would promptly move him to the bed. That was a fine night…not.

That time they got him in within two minutes, weighed him and then gave him a carefully measured dose of Versed. Within twenty minutes, he was giggling and snuggly and trying to play with his car and ball but not really able to grip well. Within forty-five minutes of being given the dose, he was about to fall asleep and actually did so in the assistant’s arms as we were made to leave the room. They extracted his tooth (I need to get a picture of this posted, actually – yes, I kept the tooth) and put a crown on the tooth next to it to prevent any cavities or weakness. He woke up screaming for mommy (mostly because he was around strangers) and immediately went to nurse. Within a few hours he was back to normal and within 48 hours he was mostly healed up. It was nerve-wracking for me but not traumatic for any of us in the least.

So, you know, two entirely different experiences and I can say that I preferred the first one, though I preferred the lack of severity of the second (fillings versus extraction). I’m not entirely thrilled with Dr. P’s practice anymore but since we’re leaving, I don’t think it will be an issue. The reason has a lot to do with how she handled the fillings but also that, though she claims she is a “big proponent of breastfeeding”, she did everything she could do get me to wean Noah. First it was about night-weaning. Then it was about weaning during the day. Then it was about sippy cups (we’ve told her he’s already using sippy cups and have done for a year now but she insinuated we must not be).

Her dental assistants also don’t know that breastfeeding is a clear liquid and actually cautioned me against breastfeeding Noah after the first procedure because “dairy would mess up his tummy”. Mind you, I don’t expect dentists to know an excessive amount about breastfeeding but I do expect a pediatric dentist to at least be aware of the current recommendations by the AAP and WHO, as well as the basics in regards to the infants in their care (clear liquids, not dairy, etc).

Maybe my mama bear side has just come out and I’m protective of my son. It’s also no secret that I’m a lactivist at heart…but I just can’t understand why someone would choose to work with infants and young children and not take the time to learn simple facts about other important areas of their health. Maybe I’m wrong to expect that much…but I don’t think so.

Whatever the case may be, I’m just happy Noah is happy and healthy.

I rarely do meta tags or keywords but since this entry may help other parents, I am.
Keywords: toddler teeth, versed, sedation, dental work, pediatric dentistry, papoose board, breastmilk, breastfeeding, sippy cups, cavities, fillings, crowns, weaning, grooves in baby teeth

I am so tired that I don’t want to be awake but I haven’t had my “me time” tonight. Well, I guess I have now, but Noah fell asleep about thirty minutes ago and I’m used to around an hour or two before I go to sleep. If I don’t unwind I end up stressed out the next day.

I think tomorrow will be a good day though. We’re going out to the recycling center to get some newspaper for our fragiles and we’ll start packing those up. We’re also still rooting through our stuff…it’s amazing what we have and don’t need. I’ve been tempted to go through Noah’s toys because he has so many and he’ll get more but it’s hard to do that. Everything has sentimental value for me. Maybe I’ll grab the stuff that I absolutely can’t get rid of and that he doesn’t play with and stick it in his baby box to deal with some other time.

Clothes are another thing that are hard for me. Memories are attached to EVERYTHING but I don’t want my life to be lived in the past. I need to make room for our future, as corny as that sounds. Even if this falls through and we’re stuck here, we need more space.

On a cuter, more journal-type note, Noah did something adorable today. (Yeah yeah, what’s new? =P) He went over to the computer desk and got our attention for something. Joshua offered the mouse – no. He offered the top DVD on Noah’s stack of DVDs (we didn’t pack his) – no. He offered the entire stack – yes. Then Noah proceeded to pick up each DVD case, consider it and then put it back down. Oswald kept his attention the longest and it really looked like he was reading the back of the DVD case the way someone reads the back of a book. Oswald was put down though in favor of Bob the Builder, which Noah brought over to me with this adorable pleading expression. Joshua was already headed to the room to get his laptop and I said, “Daddy is gonna do it! Go get Daddy!” so Noah GRINS and runs after Joshua.

He was incredibly impatient while Joshua got the laptop and was singing “Bob! *gibberish* Bob!” down the hallway along with Joshua who was singing the theme song. He kept handing me the DVD case because Joshua was taking too long (according to mister impatient) and kept trying to mash buttons on the laptop to turn the movie on while it loaded. Then, when it turned on, he sang along to the theme song (and Noah has NOT seen Bob the Builder often) and clapped and cheered when the characters did.

I can’t believe it, but I can. He’s so brilliant and he has such a strong, amazing personality. He’s real and incredible in every way. I guess I really do have a toddler, huh? Eep!